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Paddle Your Own Canoe: One Man's Fundamentals for Delicious Living, by Nick Offerman
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When it comes to growing a robust mustache, masticating red meat, building a chair, or wooing a woman, who better to educate you than the always charming, always manly Nick Offerman, best known as Parks and Recreation’s Ron Swanson? Combining his trademark comic voice and very real expertise in carpentry, Paddle Your Own Canoe features tales from Offerman’s childhood (born, literally, in the middle of an Illinois cornfield) to his theater days in Chicago to the, frankly, magnificent seduction of his wife, Megan Mullally. Offerman also shares his hard-bitten battle strategies in the arenas of manliness, love, styles, and religion, and invaluable advice on getting the utmost pleasure out of woodworking, assorted meats, outdoor recreations, and other palatable entrees.
- Sales Rank: #37254 in eBooks
- Published on: 2013-10-01
- Released on: 2013-10-01
- Format: Kindle eBook
From Publishers Weekly
In his first book, Offerman—best known for his popular character Ron Swanson on NBC&'s Parks and Recreation—opens up about his life and the values that he says have brought him prosperity and success. Each chapter of the memoir is accompanied with an essay outlining a relevant principle Offerman claims may lead the reader to a better life. The veracity of some of his statements may be called into question—vegans will bristle at his position on meat (eating red meat gives one character) and Millennials will not appreciate his dismissive attitude towards GPS devices and smartphones—but Offerman openly admits on the first page that what works for him may not be everyone&'s glass of scotch. Whether or not the reader considers his advice worth following, it is thought-provoking, profane, and frequently hilarious, although the book sometimes detours into recommendations of well-known movies and plays; Parks and Rec fans may be disappointed at the small amount of material about the show, but getting to know Offerman through his stumbling courtship with Megan Mullally and Kabuki theater training is well worth the price of admission. (Oct.)
From Booklist
Ron Swanson is a mustachioed, breakfast-food-loving, woodworking red-meat connoisseur. Nick Offerman is a mustachioed, breakfast-food-loving, woodworking red-meat connoisseur but, more important, also a real person—a grateful, gracious, bemused actor in love with his wife, Megan Mullaly (best known as Karen in Will & Grace), and the earnest simplicity of his not-so-Hollywood Hollywood existence. From his humble beginnings in Minooka, Illinois, to his meteoric rise portraying Ron Swanson on the much-loved TV show, Parks and Recreation, Offerman has lived a lot of life. He looks back as fondly on his upbringing in a small farming community with his hardworking parents and three siblings as on the time he spent at the University of Illinois and, later, in Chicago, where he received theater training. Not only does he recall his life, but he also offers chuckle-worthy anecdotes, diagrams, even a haiku (about—what else?—bratwurst) to help his readers find their own ways toward delicious living. Ron Swanson would be proud. --Courtney Jones
Review
Praise for Paddle Your Own Canoe
“[Offerman] not only explores his Paul Bunyan–like image with tongue-in-cheek lessons on manliness, complete with illustrations and advice, but also offers poignant memories of his childhood growing up in Illinois and hilarious anecdotes from his career.”—Entertainment Weekly
“Offerman touches on everything from his days as a break-dancing, football-playing farm boy in Minooka (about 50 miles southwest of the Loop) to his freewheeling, hedonistic 20s in Chicago to the inevitable Hollywood struggles that followed. But he doesn’t gloss over embarrassing moments, including his two trips to jail during college at the University of Illinois—one for shoplifting Ronnie Milsap cassettes from Kmart as a joke; the other, he says, a convoluted case of mistaken identity. Between anecdotes, he delivers impassioned pleas and rants…”—Chicago magazine
“Thought-provoking, profane, and frequently hilarious…getting to know Offerman through his stumbling courtship with Megan Mullally and Kabuki theater training is well worth the price of admission.”—Publishers Weekly
“Ron Swanson is a mustachioed, breakfast-food-loving, woodworking red-meat connoisseur. Nick Offerman is a mustachioed, breakfast-food-loving, woodworking red-meat connoisseur but, more important, also a real person—a grateful, gracious, bemused actor in love with his wife, Megan Mullally, and the earnest simplicity of his not-so-Hollywood existence. Not only does he recall his life, but he also offers chuckle-worthy anecdotes, diagrams, even a haiku (about—what else?—bratwurst) to help his readers find their own ways toward delicious living. Ron Swanson would be proud.”—Booklist
“Equal parts memoir and advice for grabbing life by the gonads. It’s funny, highly nostalgic, and will make you seriously contemplate taking up carpentry. It’s sort of like reading Garrison Keillor if he wrote for Playboy…it’s fun, it’s visceral, and I learned things. When I finished the tome I had to take a long walk to soak everything in. We should all be so lucky to one day drink with this man, or at least purchase a table from him.”—ManCave Daily
“Offerman’s funny advice book offers practical tips about living more successfully, with the sort of dry and laconic delivery that comes through in his role on Parks and Recreation.”—Time Out New York
“Uniquely honest and consistently hilarious…Fans of Offerman may not be surprised by his candor, however this book is not specifically written for the fans. [It] will be enjoyed by many, specifically those who have the capacity and the will to wonder, and to want more out of life, while maintaining a degree of simplicity and happiness; just like Nick Offerman.”—Rare
“A hilarious walkabout…teeming with tasteful vulgarity, self-deprecating hilarity and a most humble wisdom bordering on sage-like. It’s rare to find a memoir that is all at once touching, funny as sh*t, and capable of schooling you in basic modi operandi: like not being a total ass…”—Newcity Lit
“Offerman is a funny man…But what is special about Paddle Your Own Canoe is the ability it gives Offerman to reveal himself as more than just the character he plays. He believes, and has always believed, in nonconformity. He believes in humility, honesty, hard work, and loyalty — values he attributes to his parents and two favorite teachers. He believes those qualities are what truly define ‘manliness,’ but that any person, regardless of gender, should aspire to them. Paddle Your Own Canoe is a delight.”—TheManual.com
“You don’t have to be able to properly work a table saw (I can’t) or be in the market for a custom-made chair (I’m not) to buy what Parks and Recreation star/woodshop owner Nick Offerman is selling in his memoir…[a] modulated and admirable concept of what it means to live well and be a man. Offerman writes hilariously and honestly about boyhood chores and collegiate shenanigans, Chicago theater dues-paying and sobbing ‘for, like, 20 minutes’ when receiving the call about landing the Parks and Rec job…[he] offers a vivid look at how he charted the course for real happiness. It’s nothing if not inspiring.”—RedEyeChicago
Most helpful customer reviews
41 of 44 people found the following review helpful.
Review if you are a Ron Swanson/Parks and Rec Fan
By Daniel Mooney
Here the situation.
If you like Ron Swanson. Don't get this book. This is not "Parks and Rec: The novel". This is an autobiography. I think 90% of the complaints are from people who expected this book to be an extension of Ron Swanson character - talking about eating lots of meat and complaining about Tammy 2. Instead, they got a book about an actors rather ideal life in middle America, his entry into the theater world and his struggle to finding acting jobs in LA.
The books is however, HILARIOUS. Nick talks about his life in a very open and honest manner, going over both mistakes and victories. He is middle of the line political person, but also has strong views and yes, a pretty libertarian stance. He pulls no punches making fun of folks who are dependant on technology - since ALOT of folks are depenant, I'm sure many of the complaints here are from folks who were likely irked by his constant ribbing of folks who can't line with Instagram, a GPS and would die with two hours if left alone in the wilderness.
If your an open-minded person (which most people are not) then this is a VERY helpful book. He has alot of earthy advice on everything from drug use, to dating, to sex, to eating right, work ethic, etc. NICK OFFERMAN IS NOT RON SWANSON. Nor does he claim to be. Ron Swanson is an over-the-top version of Nick Offerman, written by writers who knew Nick. Nick Offerman does enjoy fishing, immensely. He doesn't not perfer hunting, tho understands many do. Nick Offerman eat's salad and veggies, but won't turn away a nice steak. Nick Offerman likes to hit the bong and watch Twin Peaks, as opposed to Ron Swanson who would mostly be found carving 1/110th 18th Century Spanish Gallon from a fallen tree near his cabin with nothing but a pen knife. He does not even mention Ron Swanson until the very last chapter.
If you are a hardcore, totalitarian conservative, Nick will probably say something to irk you. If you are a hardcore, bleeding liberal Nick will probably say something to irk you. He's not doing it on purpose - he's just in the middle of the political spectrum and is making his views clear, usually with some humor attached.
IF you are Ron Swanson/Parks and Rec fan you need to do this: Before you buy this book, then scream to high heaven and post a nasty review of it because it doesn't have things like "Ron Swanson's chart of needs" - think for a second. Look up Nick Offerman. Yes. N-I-C-K O-F-F-E-R-M-AN. Watch an interview with him on Conan O'Brien or something on Youtube. Realize that this is a person's autobiography and not a joke book.
Then once you do that, then you can ease into the tranquil warmth of what is Nick Offerman's sage-like advice and story telling.
367 of 480 people found the following review helpful.
Where's the beef? Should have called it "Humblebrags and Bitter Ranting"
By AC1647
As soon as I saw this book was available I purchased it for my Kindle and read it that same evening. As a long time fan of Parks and Rec as well as Offerman's other work, I was really excited. I know that Ron Swanson is a fictional character, but one of the things that sets the charachter apart is how little Offerman has to "act" to be believed. As a trip to the Offerman Woodshop website will show you, he truly is passionate about some of the same things that Ron Swanson espouses. He also has a killer 'stache. That's sadly where the similarities end.
(SPOILER ALERT: I reflect on things I didn't like in the text, with minor specifics. Proceed with caution if you want to be suprised by the tale of his life)
I didn't expect a book "by Ron Swanson" but the only amusing parts of this work are written in the spirit of the character. I laughed out loud several times only to realize it was Mr. Offerman "taking his character's voice" briefly. He then promplty rebukes the sentiment that was amusing in the first place. Offerman takes great pains to point out that he is not the source for Ron Swanson, and is even somewhat self referential about why anyone would find his real story compelling. He's right there, as I struggled through several chapters that only served the purpose of recounting his experiences with high school girls. These stories are neither unique nor meaningful, in fact they're mostly boring. Awkward teenage romance has been mined pretty well, Offerman strikes nothing new here.
Perhaps the greatest dissapointment was the sheer amount of time spent on opinions. I'm inclined to accept Mr. Offerman's opinion on things he likely knows a great deal about, like growing a mustache or using a hand plane. Indeed I bought this book for exactly that earlthy wisdom. Instead, Offerman spends an inordinate amount of time discussing politics, religion, sustainability, morals and vices. It's not only outside his wheelhouse but also plainly uninformed. He paves over complex arguments with base generalities and writes off dissenters as fools. The crux of his argument is that certain groups, ranging from religious believers to 9-5 office workers, are naive imbeciles. If you count yourself in either group, count on being at least mildly insulted. Offerman believes in your right to think and act as you wish, but he will gladly deride you in his text. Offerman has this figured out, he asked his own gut and it told him what's what. Think you have a compelling case for why you chose the path you did? Offerman says you're wrong, but that's your right so now hush up about it.
That I think is the most damaging aspect of this work. Offerman believes in a free spirit that permits anything that doesn't hurt another person. He admonishes us that the use of society is to keep us from our animal urges, and suggests the goal is to not be mean to eachother. He brags about mischeif and petty crimes while griping that there's nasty people in the world. He blusters at people who spew hate and then levels his vitrol on institutions and concepts that people live by. It's not just religion or politics. Think drugs are dangerous? Buy food at a discount grocer to save a buck? Work in an industry that's not farming or theater? Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. The only people who get a pass for being regualr work-a-day citizens with samrtphones and Sunday Worship Services are his own family. He's a bully, but he's too conceited to realize that fact. He is what he detests and doesn't know it.
I wanted to learn from this man about WHY Scotch is a great libation and how to enjoy it. I wanted to learn about hardwoods and canoes. I expected to discover what he thinks about as he plays his popular character and what he taps into. I wanted some tips on fishing waters in the Mid-West. I wanted to be amused, by a comedic actor, a pretty low bar. What I got instead was a tale of how lucky Nick Offerman is, what he likes and dislikes, and an undeveloped philosophy that you could pick up from any barfly.
These aren't fundamentals for living. Even if I agree with half of his admittedly unbaked world view, I bought this book to be entertained. It failed in that regard. I won't stop watching and enjoying Mr Offerman's characters, and I admit that being Nick Offerman sounds really cool, but if you want some fundamentals for living, skip this book and learn to tie some knots. If he means what he says, Mr. Offerman would be proud of you for it.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
Nick is a better writer than Ron Swanson would be!
By Rob Core
Imagine Ron Swanson wrote his autobiography.
Now, I love me some Ron Swanson - that work sounds really interesting and cool in theory.
In reality, it would probably be 40 pages, and read like bad Hemmingway with Ayn Randian philosophy (with an 18 page speech on why the government should not interfere with the producers of meat). Great for kitsch value, and the barbecue advice, but probably short of laughs.
Instead, we get Paddle Your Own Canoe - a hilarious memoir from the man who inspired some of the BEST facets of Ron's personality, but who is also a gifted performer and a (who knew?) skilled and genuinely funny writer.
It's not a straightforward chronology, but loosely follows his childhood and adolescence in rural Illinois, college years in Urbana, early career in Chicago and his move to LA, interspersed with funny, heartfelt and useful asides and advice.
Check it out. It's really, genuinely good and laugh-out loud funny in many places.
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